.Monday, August 24, 2009 ' 1:20 AM Y
LOVEssssssssssDays has gone&I'm still alone without you by my side
You're not here with me forever I swear. But again I am asking too much from god.
Is there a need for you to leave my world? That's what I am asking myself everynight .
Every single night I sit at my bed thinking how come you leave me alone&how did love slip away.
I could never get th answer over again & again.
even though you're far far away from me, I can only say- I am here to stay with you.
proofing to you that you'll never be alone.
we are so near but yet is still far apart cause of th walls that block us away.
th other night I thought I hear you crying alone in a corner.
trying to ask me come over to hold & to hug you with th love we used to have.
I can even hear your prayers & feel out hows your feeling were.
I promise I will bear up all your burdens all your unhappy stuff without giving you a single burden.
that's what I can do right now. for you & only you.
Just want you to know how badly I need you when you are not there.
I can bear for you your burdens stuffs and stuffs.
but is there anyone out there to pull me up when I fall again & again?
I kept telling myself I am not alone and you're not alone.
cause that is only th way which can cheer me up when I am deeply hurt.
again I told myself, God has taken away th gift from me & will never return it back to me.
so why just can't I give up?
th feeling was like, thousands or even millions of needles is poking in my heart.
kept telling myself to give up & and continue my life. it is actually easy to say it out. but when you gonna do it, th taste or I shall say th feeling is totally different than saying out.
I swear I only have this kind of feeling towards you and only you.
you let me know how sweet is th taste of th love we used to have.
but can I ask God to return me that special gift of mine to prove to him that I will cherish you?
I doubt so.
as long as you're happy, I will not beg God for returning back that special gift to me.
cause He has given you a special gift who can replace me for life.
don't care about my feeling. just do whatever you wish to do. just treat me as a stranger.
just treat me as nobody to you. you will be happy only if you treat me as nothing.
I know I will feel hurt but that's th only thing I can do for you .
I am not good in everything only a useless bum.
becuase I feel like I am so useless, I don't wish to give you another burden.
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